Haiti comes back to bite America’s butt

Seeing the images on Al-Jazeera of the devastation in Haiti, a country repeatedly labeled as one of the most unfortunate places in the world, one cannot help but notice that most the anger that’s coming out of the tiny country in the northern Atlantic is increasingly being directed at the United States of America.

Strange icons of religion, the superstars of the American Right like Pat Robertson are not making things any easier by rambling on about irrelevancies, talk about singing to a hungry man! I mean, we all know about that old story of Haiti being the Devil’s backyard but do we have to bring up fire-and-brimstone sermons at a time when the most important thing on the minds of the Haitians is to get their loved ones from under the concrete slabs?

In the few hours after the 7.0 earthquake hit, officials put the death toll at 100,000. This number has been rising steadily. On the news, by the time I left home, the number being bandied around was 300,000. The America Secretary of State Hillary Clinton said she feared more people were going to turn up dead.

The Americans, on the face of it, seem to be responding to this tragedy with all the appropriate moves. They were first on the scene; the president, Barack Obama has expressed his government’s commitment to help as much as possible and the country is leading the efforts to help the poor nation.

But after years of meddling in the affairs of Haiti, it is perhaps not so surprising that analysts and talking heads are making it a point to lash out at America, blaming it for this catastrophe. Never mind that nature’s not to be trifled with and as humans, we can only do so much to stop nature from wrecking havoc, America is being blamed for the breakdown of structures that has put Haiti in the cross hairs like a sitting duck.

And what did they do? They returned twice deposed president Jean Bertrand Aristide to power and arm-twisted him to accept policies that many of the commentators are saying were not favourable. In short, Aristide sold his soul for the presidency; he accepted to be a puppet and valuable time in which changes in structures; regulation in construction, empowerment of the rice farmers and so on, was lost.

It’s the tear-jerking pictures on the tube of bodies lying on top of the rabble and women crying beside the bodies of their husbands that will force the world to look at these accusations with another mind.

respectfully borrowed from Associated Press

A Paul Kafeero refrain

People have been shouting about gay relations for a long time, it’s getting really old. One would think it’s an effort to enact a Paul Kafeero song; y’know, one of his sad chronicles of the troubles of life in Uganda.
The late singer was known for his creativity when it came to social commentary. No one has come close to being the super bard of Uganda as Kafeero did.

Had he been alive today, you bet he would have come up with a number of songs about this whole gay thing but in keeping with his proven powers of analysis, one can safely say he wouldn’t have been another gay basher in the image of David Bahati.

Paul Kafeero would probably have a clever track asking what this whole issue was about anyway; he’d probably ask, tongue-in-cheek if being gay was all that alien after all. It has been said that the lifestyle has been practiced in our communities without incident in the past.

What would bring the singer at a critical point between commercialism and clear sense would be what his listeners want to hear. Kafeero’s fans always lapped up whatever he served, mainly because they felt it was all sense. It was his ability to turn an everyday subject into serious thought provoking music that earned him his accolades.

Because, truth be told, the way people are foaming at the mouth over how Ugandan MPs go about their business, one would get confused, just as Kafeero’s audience would be. I mean how many times do you see the New York Times going local over an issue in a country on the other side of the world?

Of course the Bahati Bill will not go through, not with all these gun barrels we have been forced to stare down. But I bet Kafeero would milk this one, coming up immediately after its thrown out, with one about bullies in the mist of donor aid.

Bukenya sneers at Mbabazi’s job

Professor Gilbert Bukenya, Uganda’s Vice President is one interesting character. He is always reinventing himself in the face of all sorts of adversity. The jolly, rotund politician is increasingly turning into a one-man army, a modern-day Rambo who just doesn’t know when to say quit.

The Professor’s latest antics in which he was quoted in the local media refuting reports that he would be hanging up his gloves, bring that MC Hammer track to mind: Too Legit to Quit.(this is where I should insert a YouTube video but I can’t wait for Karamoja to develop…I mean I cant wait for this slow internet to make up its mind. Blame Infocom).

The press offered, ‘Bukenya backs off Mbabazi’s position’ but methinks, according to the article beneath, ‘Bukenya sneers at Mbabazi’s job‘ should have been more like it. The guy was there like the fox in the fable turning away apparently disinterested and saying the grapes are sour after all.

After reading about Gilbert Bukenya’s actions for the last six years, it is hard to believe he is telling the truth when he says he is not interested in being the NRM’s Secretary General. He might say the SG is a lowly position but we all know that’s just in theory; in the NRM’s Uganda, that is the sheit. Being SG is a foot in the doorway if one’s ambition is to be president.

And all that mobilizing Professor Bukenya has been doing over the years can’t be because he is such a loyal subject of President Museveni. He obviously has his eyes on the top spot. Only problem is that there’s another dog that’s more hungry.

Well, having been given such comic relief with stories about the mafia stalking the Veep, taking photographs of his mango trees, crossing the no-no line and trying to incriminate the President in the Chogm car scandal (is it surprising that all of a sudden someone let Mirundi out?), visiting that shrine in 2004 and of course that whole Jamila Nakku saga, one can only think of one thing: get the popcorn and put up your legs. Its going to be another ride.

Oh, and happy new year. I have a feeling this one’s going to be interesting.

Hunting party

I wonder what to think of our law. Recent efforts by the government in the fight against corruption would seem to point to a renewed commitment to rout out the vice once and for all.

A number of officials, who would never have had to fear for their futures in the past regarding their ‘official activities’, have been arresteed at Parliament. The joke is that if you are a big shot and get summoned to face some committee, pack your bags for jail. Coz, chances are that you’ll be facing a hostile group of politicians bent on showing the rest of us that they are straight; that they are good citizens trying to fight corruption. Of course, they do not want us to side-track them into questions on the silly increments they demand now and then in their salaries or the ridiculous demands for gas guzzlers. If they think there’s even a tiny sign of impropriety on your side, you are going to the Water.

But , I would think it has something to do with the pressure from without. After that embarassing business with the vanishing Aids/Tuberculosis and GAVI funds, top government people are trying hard to get out of the spotlight but nothing’s going, it seems.

The world thinks this corruption sheit is going too far; there are thieves in every government in the world, presumably and the world has come to accept that. But when the theft gets to the levels at which it has in Uganda, someone’s gotta stand up and say, “hell no!”

So we are probably going to be seeing a few more arrests and the top government people distancing themselves from the corrupt. We shall probably see all those laws that government is threatening to unleash coming into existance. Then the pressure will start to subside.

We sit here hoping that by the time we get into real big business, the thieves will be too scared to demnd for the huge cuts they do now. Maybe then, it will be subtle and it will be up to us to decide if they deserve a present or not.

As things stand today, business is not usual down this side.

Rolling

Been a topsy turvy life lately. In an effort to contribute to the general mood (babies in the Ug blogosphere), this is to announce that this writer became the happy father of another beautiful little girl. This happened earlier than that of the REAL Blogger babies that where born to two of our best.

And the arrival of mine’s exposed something I thought would never apply to me and mine; it just happened, its something I couldn’t fight.

The attention that’s being showered on the new arrival is enough to create a ki- mango in anyone’s throat. Seriously. And it’s not like we go out and just tell the first one to “scoot off the chair so your sister can sleep comfortably” just for just. Little babies are really helpless and when you have to make decisions regarding how to behave before she next soils her diaper or just how to hold her the next time as she nurses, the demands of Numero Uno cease to be so important. It’s strange that only a few days ago, I could drink the water she’d been bathed in.

So now I know that my work’s cut out for me; I have to try to make her feel that she’s still the light in my world. I have to dispel any shadows that might linger that might make her think she’s been replaced.

Oh, and being a dad of two is definitely not the same as being the dad of one. I can almost feel the reconfiguration of my brain as I adjust to the new role.

I is cookie monster

A minister from Buganda has ‘stunned’ his people by saying he doesn’t respect the Kabaka anymore. Apparently it stems from the treatment he received recently as he tried to meet the monarch. Methinks this is just a ruse. He musta been planning his getaway and he just needed a break. So now we are going to be treated to another round of accusations and he will probably be outed as a non Muganda like a certain Sabalangira Besweri Mulondo who dared “look into the Kabaka’s mouth.”

Red herring, I say. It is designed to make loyal followers of the Kabaka froth at the mouth and stop thinking about what’s important. And of course the minister has chosen his side. He will be taken away from the front, when the president and the Kabaka mend fences tomorrow, and be taken to the secretariat. There, he will be allowed to grow fat and lazy. And if the National Guidance Minister, Alhaji Kirunda Kiveindha’s example is to be followed, after some years, he will be recalled from the back office, dusted over and given a new ministry. That’s how things work, son.

Meanwhile, Egypt is trying to convince the world that they are not giving the countries of the Nile Basin a raw deal. It’s during public disturbances like we have now that big decisions are made. The public’s input is absent in the discourse because the people are someplace else fighting some phantoms.
Oh, and Zzimwe has been contracted to repair the Old Park. I don’t know about your faith these days but after all the potholed roads attributed to this company, I not going to applaud just yet.

These are a few of my favourite … scenes

Every now and then, I come across someone who upon learning that I like to read, will ask me how many books I have read in my life. I stopped responding with an open mouth and wide eyes and then the pulling out my hair. I realized long ago that it was pointless. There are people who think that question can be answered.

Instead, I want to think, I can recall some scenes from books I have read over time; books that made an impression on me. Maybe then, I can give a good answer. So I start…

Phileas Fogg arrives at the Royal Society of Science after going round the world in 80 days, thereby winning his bet.

Angel Hudson arrives in Hollywood

Malcolm Gladwell’s description of Paul Revere’s Midnight Run in The Tipping Point

Lankunle’s crazy outfit

Sadiku spilling the beans to Sidi about Baroka’s alleged ‘condition.’

Dorian Gray plunging the knife into the portrait.

Othello and Desdemona making the ‘beast with two backs.’

Gulliver waking up to find himself the prisoner of the Lilliputians.

Tom Thumb is swallowed by the giant.

Rip van Winkle wakes up after 20 years.

Oedipus slays his dad.

Sydney Carton dies for Charles Darnay in A Tale of Two Cities.

Victor Henry’s cruiser, the USS Northampton is sunk by Japanese torpedoes.

Mary Warren turns on John Proctor and accuses him of ‘witching’ her in front of the magistrate.

The drums grow louder as the end of Udomo nears.

Seriously, who can remember all the stories they’ve read in their life?

Heeding Noah’s warning

Government has no excuse this time, or so it seems. Usually, when crises fall, there’s so many scapegoats running around. For the entire time that this administration’s been in power, there’s always been an excuse for everything that’s gone down.

Ministers have refused to resign, when someone has raised the option when something went awry on their watch. Resign? A Ugandan minister?

But the floods are starting next month. The meteorologists in Entebbe have done what they always do year in, year out and warned of what might happen if the floods get here and no steps have been taken to see to it that nothing’s damaged.

But last night on the news, I saw the good Professor Tarsis Kabwegyere Uganda’s minister for disaster preparedness addressing the nation (at the Media Center, so it was official, no?) telling us the government knows what’s coming. He even said there are plans to harness the waters should they rise. They have all these plans drown up telling the weather gods to bring it on.

Beyond the politics, I think this should be a point to hold them to account. Previous floods have caught the administration flat footed. Agreed we have all been guilty. But the authorities have always blamed everyone and everything but themselves. The official line is for a grown man to blame the opposition, the rioters, Gadaffi, past leaders (oh sorry, they’re all dead now) even when the facts are staring him in the face.

I believe that the government has the resources to save lives and property in flooded areas. I believe that there is enough time to plan for these emergencies. Apart from a whole ministry dedicated to disaster preparedness, there is a planning unit that does all the necessary planning for all government agencies.

In short, there’s no excuse this time.

I will try hard to ignore the sinking feeling up in my throat about this chest thumping. I will pray that what happened during the last two floods in eastern Uganda will not happen again.

I’ll take…Kampala

The violence, as we all know, was not exactly surprising. This will happen again, one can be sure about that, as long as one side does not feel like they are getting a fair deal. And from what’s been doing the rounds, people are not satisfied.

People are not sufficiently cowed though. Arresting 160 people is redundant, really. I am thinking, we should be looking at the next step. What should we do?

Having grown up in Kampala, I am a certified assimilado. My people come from elsewhere but all I know, all I can really hold materially as important has been right here.

I would have just looked on to the next event if not for the disturbing undercurrents of violent tribalism that were exhibited during the four days of mayhem. The sight of a beat up Lt. Col. Kulayigye at Bulange (what in hell was he doing in that area at that time of all times?) can’t be easily erased.

The good Colonel was told to sing the Ekitiibwa kya Buganda and reportedly forced to do other things he’d never have done by his own volition.

But I heard the unmistakable hate chants directed at people with long noses and for me, that’s scary. I might see myself as an assimilated musoga (not even from the west, you see) but to many people, I look like I am from Mbarara, all because of deceptive facial features.

I have been called a mulaalo for long enough for me to know that should those idle threats ever tip over into real action, it would be wise for me to stay indoors. Or throw in my lot with the devil.

This then brings in other issues that would have seemed unthinkable to me. I do not like the way this government is going about the business of governing my country but if it is going to keep the madness underneath, short of fleeing, I might find myself going to the polls in 2011 with an amended view of what ‘voting wisely’ means.

Doctor, doctor, shall I die?

A few days ago I was in the country, moonlighting with a lady who was in Uganda to do a short film on malaria. I comforted myself that it was not so bad since she was supposed to be doing something good for my people – the video is to be used by Makerere University College of Health Science for something or other.

Going aface, we went to many places. Naturally, she wanted to see ‘the real Uganda.’ I obliged. I tried not to think of the exploitation that this whole thing smirked of. I reminded myself time and again that this was for a good cause, even when a number of the locals we met deep in Busoga couldn’t be bothered. “We are tired of those Bazungu who come here, take our pictures and disappear, leaving us in the same state,” they said.

I met an old woman who had gone to a health center and who was being turned away by the medical workers. She had a resurgent high blood pressure issue and she was due to see the doctor in Jinja town. The medics at the Center II did not have the skills or the resources, anyway, to help her.

They kept on telling her that her condition was dire and that she had to find a way to get to Jinja town. This was just a few kilometers from the town – along Kamuli Road. She gave up at last. She didn’t have the Shs2000 to take her and bring her back. She limped away.

I ran over and gave her the money I had in my pocket. But even as I did this, I knew this was futile and maybe a form of disrespect; would I give everyone a few thousand shillings in the village? How far can charity go?

The Center IIs in the countryside still use Chloroquine and Fansidar to treat malaria. That’s all they’ve got. They have heard that these drugs are not to be used but whoever tells them these things does not provide a solution.

Even right in the middle of Kampala (Bwaise Kimombasa), people still resort to Aloe Vera and other plants to treat themselves. The doctors up in the concrete jungle say traditional healers are all just a bunch of crooks. Problem is after these jeremiads, there’s the sound of silence where solutions would have been.